extreme humiliation

I do embarrassing things.
I say embarrassing things.
Sometimes, I wear embarrassing things... (I'm getting better at that).
Embarrassing things happen to me!

But today... Today trumps them all. Today went beyond embarrassing and straight to humiliation.

Let's start from the end...

This afternoon, I was taking a little nap in my room, and my roommate came home and asked; "how your presentation go?"
My response: "I threw up"
Her: "Oh. I'm sorry."
Me; "During the presentation."

Yeah. During the presentation.

I thought things were good. I was ready for the final presentation of my undergraduate career The presentation was ready, power point was working, videos were loaded. I got up, actually ate breakfast, actually put make up and dressy clothes on, did my hair was feeling just fine. Everything was good.

I gave the first part of the presentation, then, as my partner did her portion I started feeing a little woozie. So I decided to sit down (which I would normally never do in a presentation!). I sat on a stool in front of the class and apologized for sitting and told them I wasn't feeling well. The not feeling well became something that I couldn't work through. My speech became a little slurred and a little stuttery. (Have I mentioned I am a speech therapy major?!)

Finally, I hit my breaking point (which was starting to gag in front of my classmates). I handed the clicker to my shocked partner excused myself, and bolted for the door in the back of the room.

Luckily, my friend SB had grabbed a garbage can and run out the other door. I proceeded to toss my cookies in the hallway. The teacher came out of the classroom to check on me and they were all very nice. I was able to go back in and finish the last portion of the presentation.

But now I have to drop out of school due to pure humiliation.

And I was so close...

(PS: we got a 95 on the presentation!)

Frustration

Today, I was frustrated (Actually a few times this week, I've been frustrated, but that's another story...). I was frustrated and my feelings were hurt and I was left on my own (because I am an adult) to deal with that frustration. The problem is that the techniques I taught as a nanny (fold your hands together, practice self control, count to ten, etc.) are generally reserved for situations where you are about to do something you regret (like punch your sister). In terms of flight or fight, I am a flight girl. I will run rather than face confrontation. So today I flighted.

This post, dear readers, probably won't make much sense, sorry about that. The person I am most frustrated with has no clue.(I spent hours on something and was blown off with no thought or consideration.) I just decided I am tired of having a one-sided relationship with this individual.(Who says 'we should talk' but never actually makes time) And I am certain that the reason for my tipping point was lost on them.

(Or am I just burning bridges because it's easier than having people drift away once I'm gone?)

On top of that, the EQP is currently in my kitchen doing my roommates nasty dishes. I am so embarrassed. In the sink is a pot full of ramen noodles that have been there for at least 4 days because I refuse to take care of them. Tomorrow I'm cooking for dinner group, so I'll probably clean them up before then, if there are any left.

(I can't wait to be in a house where yes, I'll likely do the dishes, but they will be done- and I'll get paid to do them!) 

And the past few days I've had headaches so bad I've pulled out my borderline narcotics from the perma-headache.

And now I feel like a Debbie downer. 

Let's list some happy things:

• Graduation is in less than a month (I'm not counting days anymore, it stresses me out too much).
• I have really cute fingers and toes.
• Tonight we had family dinner for the first time in a long while. It was nice, and my sister R wasn't TOO mean to me. 
• I have awesome plans for every weekend for the next month! A trip to Moab, 2 trips to Idaho, and a weekend at General Conference! (Not in that order-- Conference, Idaho, Moab, Idaho/home)
• My pain-killers are starting to work, which means bed time draws nigh.
• I had a beautiful afternoon nap.
• I looked way good today. (This is especially good because I didn't feel well)
• My S roommate is back from being gone all weekend. I missed her mucho! 
• I get to see my momma in less than 2 weeks. (and my Dad too!)
• And the nieces. (and my brother and sister in law.)
• I'm moving near my K sister, who I haven't seen in almost a year now. 
• I have no more midterms left
• After Wednesday I'll be all done with presentations. 
• This weekend I sent a whole batch of stuff back home (This is load 1 of 4. probably)
• Life is good. 
• Oh, someone asked if he could set me up with his roommate... forget the fact that the next month of my life is crazy busy, I said yes... it was flattering.
• I washed my face already, which means I'll remain the same skin age for 7 days longer. 
• I'm making sweet and sour kielbasa for dinner tomorrow, which is delicious. And the Kielbasa is turkey and lean and was on sale. And I already made the cabbage salad, it's just got to be spruced up tomorrow.
• I got to go to my friend's wedding reception last night. It was beautiful and I am so happy for her. 
• Modern medicine is good. 

See Emily, life is good. 

why I have backed away from Rom-Com's

I used to be the kind of girl who loved a romantic comedy. All of them, I just loved them, could watch them all day. However, as of late... they're not my favorite. I still love the classics, While You Were Sleeping, You've Got Mail, etc. But for the most part, I'd rather go see a shoot 'em up movie...

Today, however, my roommate and I got "Life as we know it" at the Redbox.

It's a little like Raising Helen, but with two people...

..and I hated it. It got over and I hated it. Do you know why?

It made me wish for a friend to die in a freak accident and leave me their baby to raise with an attractive friend who I hated but soon fell in love with.

This is about as plausible as me running into the man of my dreams in the express lane at the supermarket, when I have 13 items instead of 10.  (Scroll to the end of this post to understand this one Shopping Cart Love)

And what kind of jerk wishes her friends would die so she could have their kid...

Me.

I'm that kind of jerk.

Krazy Glue

Today I opened my third tube of Krazy Glue this semester. That's right, THIRD.

Why, you may ask, do I use so much of that very sticky stuff? To stick me back together of course.

I always thought it was my very dry skin, but perhaps it is my reaction to stress inherited from my dad. I guess my whole life, my skin has cracked and bled during the winters. When I was little, I remember it being just on the knuckles of my fingers, as a senior in High School I spent months with cracks all over the backs of my hands. (Many tears, lotions, well meaning people asked if I ever tried lotion, and at least 4 doctors later, with some topical cortisone and some oral antibiotics, it got cleared up.) I haven't really had a problem since. Till this year.

I don't mean to whine. Except, I do. I HATE having yucky hands! I hate that it hurts to do normal things. The cracks on my thumb make using a knife to prepare food painful-- and it aggravates the cracks. Even brushing my teeth hurts. And all they can tell me to do is lotion, and super glue. Also, I have a bunch of roommates who don't do dishes, so I do them, which makes everything worse!

These aren't my thumbs... but it's what they look like. 

I'm the girl who never leaves home without super glue.



Sensy. So sensy.

**I like the Krazy glue brand best, the little tube to keep it in is handy (and spill proof), plus the stopper for the tube of glue is a pin, so the tip doesn't get clogged. I figure if I have an opinion I ought to share it.**

Seven Days...

No, I promise that I am not doing another one of those prompt things (today...). I am simply sharing some useful information that... scared the life out of me!

Sometimes I feel like I have oppositional defiance disorder. It's where you don't like doing the things that people tell you to. Like brushing your teeth (I ALWAYS do it, I sometimes just don't like to... TMI, I know). This also applies to washing my face at night, until...

One night, we were getting ready for bed, and my roommate was washing her face and I said something like "yeah... I probably ought to do that..."(Note: I generally wash my face in the mornings in the shower, and rarely wear any foundation/base/blush/etc makeup, so I feel like I don't have that much to wash off.)

Then she told me the scariest thing ever:

"EVERY TIME YOU DON'T WASH YOUR FACE AT NIGHT, YOU ADD SEVEN DAYS TO THE AGE OF THE SKIN ON YOUR FACE!"

Holy Hannah, are you terrified? I was! That means that if you skip a whole week you'd add almost 50 days to your face. That's a lot. Enough to scare me into washing my face.

Mostly because I don't want this to happen to me:

Image generated by Morphster. Not an original picture of how I look (except for maybe the bags under my eyes).

For some validity: My roommate heard this from our former roommate who is a public health major. It's for real!

Last of the 30 days

Day 30- your favorite song


I believe that this one will have to be a genre thing. 


Hymn:
Lead Kindly Light

Country:
I can't really pick a favorite one here... most of what I listen to is country. 


Karaoke:
Before He Cheats, Carrie Underwood
*this is my favorite because it was the first and only song I ever intend to sing at karaoke, it just had to be checked off the bucket list...*

Don't judge the picture, I just had to have proof that we did it. Notice how both girls are pushing their mics towards me!

Soundtrack Song:
I See the Light, Tangled

Flogging Molly: (yes, a category of it's own)
If I Ever Leave this World Alive 

Or...
Rebels of the Sacred Heart (mostly I like the opening lines of this one...)

"Well I'm aimin' for heaven, but probably wind up down in hell..."

Dance Party Song:
Gives You Hell, All American Rejects

Musical Song:
I Have Confidence, Sound of Music

Break-up Song
Shut up and Drive, Chely Wright

Song that's actually a play:
Shopping Cart Love, Christine Lavin. 

If you only watch one of these clips, choose THIS ONE!! You won't be sorry. 

I love music. I just wish that my life had a soundtrack... Sigh... someday. 

day 29- in this past month, what have you learned

I am a nerd. But bare with me. (or feel free to ignore this post all together). This is an ear. This month in school I learned EXACTLY how hearing works. It just fascinates me. SO... you get to learn.

Above you see the outer ear. The sound goes into the pinna (outer ear), through the ear canal and moves the tympanic membrane (AKA ear drum). On the other side of the eardrum are 3 ossicles (tiny ear bones) in an air filled cavity. Ok, so most people can probably tell you about hearing up to this point. Here's where it gets exciting!

The final ossicle is called the stapes. Its footplate lines up to the oval window. On the other side of the oval window is a liquid filled spiral called the cochlea. The vibrations of the ossicles cause the stapes to send waves into the cochlea. Those waves activate hair cells along the cochlea depending on the frequency. You can see  on the above diagram that High frequencies activate near the base and low frequencies near the tip.

And the excitement continues!

In the cochlea there are LOTS and lots of hair cells. 3 rows of outer hair cells, and one row of inner hair cells. As the different parts of the cochlea are stimulated by different frequencies it causes the Outer hair cells to move, the movement opens up small ion channels and a positive potassium ion rushes into the negatively charged cell. In order to kick the potassium out, the cell begins to 'dance'.

This upper most outer hair cells are connected to the tectorial membrane. The dancing of the outer hair cells causes the liquid inside the organ of corti. This causes the ion channels in the inner hair cell to open, admitting potassium and when the electrical build up reaches threshold, neurotransmitters are released and sent to the brain via the cochlear nerve.

Tell me that's not amazing! It is happening every second of every day. Without our even knowing it, or controlling it.

Who said the body isn't amazing? And next time you get angry with your body for revolting against you (which happens) Think about all it's doing right!

1 year.

Day 28- a picture of you from last year and now, how have you changed since then?





This picture was taken a little less than a year ago, in May of 2010. I look at that picture of myself and I was so happy and confident and optimistic towards the future. For a long time I couldn't look at pictures like this, of myself last summer without thinking what a stupid girl I was. So naive, so trusting. 
Now I see the change that has occurred. I wouldn't wish my fall semester on my worst enemy, it was so hard. Physically as well as emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Looking back, I see how I was strengthened. I see the people the Lord put in my life to help and lift me. I can't count the number of spiritual confirmations I had that I was a child of God, that I had worth. I have come out with more empathy. 
Besides that I have a stronger idea of the direction I want to pursue in my life. I know a little clearer who I am and what I am supposed to come. 


 


So this is me today (or a few months ago) I am tired, I am not as naive as I once was, but I am happy. I am happy with where my life is. I'm happy with the choices I have made, and I am optimistic towards the future. 

Another one for the bucket list :)

On Friday evening I went up to Salt Lake with my best domestic friend. We did a live session in the Salt Lake Temple (which was wonderful), and then went to see her friend and brother who live up there. On the way to her friend Fort's house we passed East High.
I know you know what East High is.... Here's a photo:

Oh yeah... it's where they filmed High School Musical. And guess what! Now I've been there...

I'd bet Zach Effron jumped off this very planter!

So I did too :)

Check it off the bucket list :)

Why...

day 27- why are you doing this 30 day challenge


I suppose the simple answer is that I saw my friends doing it and thought it would be fun. Another answer is that I enjoy having a prompt to write about. I realize that for some of you, dear readers*,  you simple skim over and see if I've said anything juicy/witty/etc. And I am not offended. I blog mostly for me, it's mostly an outlet, and since my journal writing has gone down the tube in the past 6 months or so, 30 days of prompts making me write isn't a bad thing. 


*I decided (just now) to start referring to whoever is reading my blog as "dear reader" like Jane Eyre, since that is my favorite book*

Grief... and a heavy heart.

I generally don't pay much attention to the news... what I know is from brief glances at the Daily Universe on my way to the crossword puzzle. Friday afternoon I heard about the disaster in Japan. There is something about it that just makes me cry. My heart is heavy for the people there, those who have family or loved ones there. It makes me physically ill. I follow a blog called Seattle daily Photo. It makes me happy to see pictures of the city that I love so much. Today this was their post. 


I read the description and wanted to learn more about Howard Thurman. He was an African-American (baptist?) preacher. Of him it was said that if there hadn't been a Howard Thurman there would not have been a Martin Luther King (interesting, right?). Then I found the following poem which seems to embody that which I feel for the people of Japan who have lost family, friends, homes, livelihoods, etc.:

"I share with you the agony of your grief,
The anguish of your heart finds echo in my own.
I know I cannot enter all you feel
Nor bear with you the burden of your pain;
I can but offer what my love does give:
The strength of caring,
The warmth of one who seeks to understand
The silent storm-swept barrenness of so great a loss.
This I do in quiet ways,
That on your lonely path
You may not walk alone."

(Howard Thurman, "For a Time of Sorrow," Meditations of the Heart, (New York: Harper and Brothers, 1953), p.p. 211-212.)

You've got a friend in me...

day 26- what do you think about your friends


I have been truly blessed to have amazing people put in my life. I remember going to a young women's sleepover at the five star hall as a beehive (12-13 year old) and making a frame out of puzzle pieces that said something to the effect of Your life is a puzzle, each person who comes in or out of it fills a special place and is a piece of that puzzle. 


I also think of a quote by WH Auden, 

This guy looks like a poet, doesn't he? 

It is my very favorite-- it says 

Fondly I ponder You all:
without You I couldn’t have managed
   even my weakest of lines.

That's what I think of my friends.They complete me, help me to be a better person, they are examples to me and honestly, with out them I could not have managed, especially in my less than strong times, in the valleys. They have been so amazing to me. 

Cruel to be kind

But first...Day 25- what I would find in your bag


I guess it depends on which bag. Between my everyday purse, my backpack, and my bigger purse, or my shoulder bag things change a little bit. However, there are the things that get transfered or that I have multiples of:

• Chap-stick! (I cannot live without chap-stick!)
• Bobby Pins-- you never know when you'll need one
• My Green Water Bottle-- last fall I invested in one of those metal water bottles because it was on clearance at Target... THEN I LOST IT! So after 3 trips to the campus lost and found, I broke down and bought another one, and I love it! It shifts from bag to bag and I always have it. 
• Wallet-- this one is important for legality sake
• Girly supplies-- I figure if I don't need them there may be a sister in need, better to be prepared
• Mascara-- often I have a tube of mascara in my purse because I'm running out the door and don't want to look all the way dead. 

Ok, on to the drama that is my life... sometimes I wonder how things happen in my life. Who does this stuff happen to? But the latest drama made me realize that sometimes, as the song goes, "you've got to be cruel to be kind." 

I'm too tired to go into all the details, but suffice it to say that I was a grown up and was honest and I feel proud of myself for dealing with the issue head on and not being passive aggressive. 

If all all of this stuff turns out to be nothing more than a 'growing experience' and another story to go in my book of dating memoirs it will serve it's purpose... I guess that we will learn that what dad says about giving it 20 years and it'll be comedy is true.

Also coming this weekend (if I have time), the story of the naked man in the hot tub at my complex.

Oh, the wonderful world of facebook.

Day 24- your last five facebook status'

• You know Provo is an exciting place to live when a naked guy in our hot tub means 5 cops in our courtyard all night.

(This actually happened tonight! Seriously, it was the most exciting thing that's happened in a long time here at Roman Gardens, maybe ever... I lead such a boring life, we sat and watched and listened into the conversation. The man told the police that he was the owner and he could do what he wanted on his property. He also said that the management was going to be fired! And that he was immune to clothes. )

• Has Alton Brown's Baked Macaroni and Cheese in the oven... Oh happy day!

(If you've never had this you are missing out!! Seriously, I'll make it for you some time-- if we're ever in the same state, and PLEASE, try it with salsa.)

• Got the job!!! 

(The Nanny job in Colorado/DC... there's a whole post on it)

• I had to do two things I hate today. Throw up, and ask for help. Luckily, the night ended quite nicely.

(I had a migraine that was a BEAST- and I even called my Home Teacher and asked for a blessing-- this is not something I like doing. But the night ended with a conversation with a good friend who was full of compliments, which is always nice :)

• The unexpected life is no less a life.

(This is the subtitle for a book that I've started reading, and really need to keep reading, it's called "A single voice" by Kristen Oaks. I thought it was a rather appropriate sentiment. You see, as I graduate, I have had to look realistically at my life and realize that it is not what I thought it would be, yet I have a fabulous life. I am generally very happy and fulfilled. No less a life, even if it wasn't what I thought it would be.) 

Day 23- something you crave a lot

I guess there's only one thing that I am consistently craving: SLEEP!

Now, more often it's that I don't sleep than that I can't sleep-- all too often, sleep hits low on the priority list. But hey, that's what College life is supposed to be like, right? I'm supposed to make the most important decisions OF MY LIFE while sleep deprived-- whose idea was this? That being said.. I do pretty good. I'm usually asleep by midnight and wake up between 6:30 and 7:30 Sometimes earlier or later on each end.

Other than sleep, I crave carbs, chocolate, salty things, protein and fruits and veggies. (that sounds like I pretty much just crave all foods, which is about right.) I guess I just like to eat.

It's one of my special talents.

day 22- what makes you different from everyone else

"Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You." ~Dr. Seuss


I'm not sure what makes me different. I suppose that each of my attributes contribute contribute to a unique combination of me. 


I guess my experiences are different than everyone else's or at least my reaction to my experiences. I mean... some of this stuff makes me think... WHO DOES THIS HAPPEN TO!? Maybe some of those stories will eek out sooner or later. But here's one for today:


This doesn't make me unique from my family, but we Zimmerman's have the weakest stomachs! 


Exhibit A:


Today, while I was working on getting ready for dinner group and while slicing strawberries for the parfait I  started feeling light headed, so much to the point I had to lay down. After a few minutes I got back up and started slicing again, but again, I ended up laying down on the floor. So I started checking for cuts and sure enough, I had a small, non bleeding cut on my index finger. 


I would just like to say that this PROVES it is not all in my mind-- this is a physiological response to the potential loss of blood! (Or the idea of the potential loss of blood, or the actual blood loss.)

A wandering soul...

Once upon a time, in the summer of 2008 (not so very long ago) I was serving a mission, and at that time, stationed- for lack of a better word- in Morehead City/Beaufort, North Carolina.

This is Beaufort-- I drove across that bridge several times a week. And I LOVED it!

 It was around this time that we met an amazing family, what missionaries might call "golden". It may sound horrible, but I can't remember this woman's name, but I could direct you to her house, and she hugged us like a mom. Shortly after we met them, Tragedy struck-- like it often does when you're a missionary-- and they moved to... Kentucky? I remember her praying for my companion and I that we could "go home, meet nice boys and make babies". (It worked for Sister Jolstead who now has a cute little boy!) One day we were teaching her a lesson and Something came up about all the places I had lived, or the number of times I had moved... or something like that. She then said "Oh, you're a wandering soul, just like me."

I've thought about that often since then. I am kind of a wandering soul-- adventurous, headstrong, ready to live. And... here I go again.

I decided to take a year off of school after graduating from BYU this coming April. Part of this is financial, part of it is mental. I looked around for jobs, and decided that being a nanny was the best way to save money (without moving back home-- because while I love my family, I know what's there, and I would not be happy).

I went back to my old trusty job finder-- GreatAupair.com (where I met my Alaskan family), and honestly, the very first family I looked at caught my eye. I added them to my favorites list, then they added me, some emails were exchanged, and well... 2 months later I had a job offer! Let me tell you about them!

Their names are Mary and John, they have two kids, Kelly (10) and Brian (turns 8 this week). Mary is in the Air Force, and John is in the Marines. He is stationed at the Pentagon currently, while Mary lives with the kids in Colorado (crazy right? they've been living apart for almost 3 years!), but Mary is finally getting PCS'd (Permanent Change of Station) to Fort Meade, MD. Their last nanny told them she'd stick with them till they moved, then changed her mind in February, when they got some temporary before/after school help and are now waiting for me! The kids sound so great! I'm so excited to meet them!

I only officially got the job on Friday(!) but here are my plans:

Finish up school-- I realized that I really have something planned EVERY weekend between now and graduation. Not to mention all of the school stuff-- projects, assignments, papers, etc.
GRADUATE: the blue robe has been hanging in my closet motivating me all year. The day will soon come when I will put on that beautiful piece of synthetic material and march across a stage proudly! Then I'll go home and pack! Some of my stuff I'll send directly to Colorado, some of it I'll send home with my parents on the plane to put in storage, and some of it I'll leave here for them to pick up in August when they bring Rachel out...Who knows!
Drive home: I'll likely leave Provo Saturday afternoon or Sunday. Rachel and I will pack Betsy (who I've decided to sell when I get back home) up with the remainder of our stuff, and hit the road. We're going to spend some time in Idaho with my grandparents, and a day or so in Spokane/Coeur d'Alene visiting (best) friends (mine and Rachel's) then home...
Pack/Clean/put car up for sale: The things I won't be taking with me will go into the back closet at my parent's house. Everything will be tidy and taken care of. And I'll vacuum out my car, and give her a good scrubbing, and then I'll post her on craigslist. I'm very sad about this, but I think it's the most practical thing to do-- she's been good to me, but it won't be good for her to sit for a year, and I think I might upgrade to a newer car post DC experience. (Preferably one with a radio).
Visit with friends in Seattle. Because I still have a few there :)
Get on a plane to fly to Colorado Springs!! I guess if I leave Seattle around 7 or 8am (I don't remember which) on Saturday morning, I'll get there around 2 or 3 in the pm with just one plane change (I'm crossing my fingers for SLC, but not holding my breath).
Then 2-6 weeks after I arrive in Colorado, after playing with my cousins/friends who live there, I'll relocate again this time to (drum roll please!!))

Fort Meade Maryland (I guess I said it earlier).
 For those of you who are geography challenged-- Ft Meade is about 35 minutes from Washington, DC! and only about the same distance from Baltimore. There is so much history and so much to do in BOTH those cities I am thrilled. Plus Kelly especially LOVES history, but i'd bet we could talk Brian into the American History Smithsonian if we promise to go see dinosaurs at the Earth Science Smithsonian afterwards (he likes dinosaurs)!

And... I'll only be about an hour from my Kristen sister! I'm so excited! We are going to have so much fun!

So that's the story of my wandering soul-ness. Feel free to come visit me :) I'm allowed visitors!

day 21- a picture of something that makes you happy

So the prompt was a picture... but I didn't really know what made me happy (ok, I know what makes me happy, I just couldn't think of anything). So I googled. And I found this list, I really liked it!

		Savor Everyday Moments Pause now and then to smell a rose or watch children at play. Study participants who took time to “savor” ordinary events that they normally hurried through, or to think back on pleasant moments from their day, “showed significant increases in happiness and reductions in depression,” says psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky. top
		Avoid Comparisons While keeping up with the Joneses is part of American culture, comparing ourselves with others can be damaging to happiness and self-esteem. Instead of comparing ourselves to others, focusing on our own personal achievement leads to greater satisfaction, according to Lyubomirsky. top
		Put Money Low on the List People who put money high on their priority list are more at risk for depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem, according to researchers Tim Kasser and Richard Ryan. Their findings hold true across nations and cultures. “The more we seek satisfactions in material goods, the less we find them there,” Ryan says. “The satisfaction has a short half-life—it’s very fleeting.” Money-seekers also score lower on tests of vitality and self-actualization. top
		Have Meaningful Goals “People who strive for something significant, whether it’s learning a new craft or raising moral children, are far happier than those who don’t have strong dreams or aspirations,” say Ed Diener and Robert Biswas-Diener. “As humans, we actually require a sense of meaning to thrive.” Harvard’s resident happiness professor, Tal Ben-Shahar, agrees, “Happiness lies at the intersection between pleasure and meaning. Whether at work or at home, the goal is to engage in activities that are both personally significant and enjoyable.” top
		Take Initiative at Work How happy you are at work depends in part on how much initiative you take. Researcher Amy Wrzesniewski says that when we express creativity, help others, suggest improvements, or do additional tasks on the job, we make our work more rewarding and feel more in control. top
		Make Friends, Treasure Family Happier people tend to have good families, friends, and supportive relationships, say Diener and Biswas-Diener. But it’s not enough to be the life of the party if you’re surrounded by shallow acquaintances. “We don’t just need relationships, we need close ones” that involve understanding and caring. top
		Smile Even When You Don’t Feel Like It It sounds simple, but it works. “Happy people…see possibilities, opportunities, and success. When they think of the future, they are optimistic, and when they review the past, they tend to savor the high points,” say Diener and Biswas-Diener. Even if you weren’t born looking at the glass as half-full, with practice, a positive outlook can become a habit. top
		Say Thank You Like You Mean It People who keep gratitude journals on a weekly basis are healthier, more optimistic, and more likely to make progress toward achieving personal goals, according to author Robert Emmons. Research by Martin Seligman, founder of positive psychology, revealed that people who write “gratitude letters” to someone who made a difference in their lives score higher on happiness, and lower on depression—and the effect lasts for weeks. top
		Get Out and Exercise A Duke University study shows that exercise may be just as effective as drugs in treating depression, without all the side effects and expense. Other research shows that in addition to health benefits, regular exercise offers a sense of accomplishment and opportunity for social interaction, releases feel-good endorphins, and boosts self-esteem. top
		Give It Away, Give It Away Now! Make altruism and giving part of your life, and be purposeful about it. Researcher Stephen Post says helping a neighbor, volunteering, or donating goods and services results in a “helper’s high,” and you get more health benefits than you would from exercise or quitting smoking. Listening to a friend, passing on your skills, celebrating others’ successes, and forgiveness also contribute to happiness, he says. Researcher Elizabeth Dunn found that those who spend money on others reported much greater happiness than those who spend it on themselves.