The other day, I went on a date. This wasn't really a date that was any sort of potential... just a friendly date. But we had the most interesting conversation. Now, if you've ever talked to me about my last name, you know that I love it. It means a lot to me, and I probably used the phrase "I want to find a man who will take MY last name so I don't have to give mine up."
Funnily enough... the topic came up, and I asked the boy if he would be willing to take the girl's last name. In opposite manner of every guy I've ever asked that question to, he said that he wouldn't have a problem taking a girl's name, that he wasn't very attached to his name... at that moment I realized that if I ever found a guy willing to take my last name, he probably wouldn't be the kind of guy I would want to marry anyway.
Ever since, I've thought how much of an identity my last name gives me. It makes me part of a family. It makes me belong. I know what standards of conduct and interaction I am supposed to live up to. Part of my name is telling me where I came from and who I am.
It made me wonder if that boy really knows who he is. Because we've been friends for a while, I'm not really sure he does, and that makes me so sad for him. He has a lot of potential to be a great guy, and he is a good man, but a lost man, none the less.
I just keep crossing my fingers that I'll meet someone with my same last name and I won't have to worry about it. Mostly I hope that I'll meet someone who I respect and love enough that I will want to take on his identity, be the Mrs. to his Mr. I'll want to take his name and be his family.... Or maybe I'll hyphenate :)
Interesting point. Names really are so important in our society and in the gospel as well.
ReplyDeleteAnother option: There's a couple in our ward - married - but both have different last names (she kept hers, he kept his). A little weird, but it works. :D
I had to love your Dad pretty big to let go of my Larsen name...it is still in there and still defines much of who I am. Luckily, Zimmerman is also pretty cool. Always last instead of in the middle, and that is OK. We are easy to find on lists! I'm glad that being a Zimmerman is more than just a name, but a statement of who we are. Bottom line, when you find the right guy, you may change your last name but the Zimmerman will shine through!
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